Choices, choices, choices…instantly, hourly, daily, weekly, and for a lifetime we make choices. Some big, some little, some little that become big and vice versa! We are constantly confronted with choices. And then…we not only have OUR choices to deal with, but the choices of friends and family that influence us tremendously. Your friend who is driving you home decides to stop for a few drinks…your daughter decides to take that piece of jewelry in a store that she hasn’t paid for…your husband decides it will be okay to meet that attractive female client for dinner; sometimes the choices of others impact our lives more than our own.
On top of this, we are taught from childhood that “one bad choice can impact your life forever.” As teenagers we think this is a drastic statement, but as we enter adulthood we realize how very true those words are. Looking down from traffic at a cell phone only to be hit head on causing a wreck that paralyzes for life; allowing that pornography to pop up on the computer and not immediately turning away from it; accepting that drug that has been offered “just once to see what it is like;” all of these choices can or will have life-impacting consequences.
So where do we begin in working toward making the right choices. Below are five basic steps to help you outline your life for better choice making.
1. Seek God’s will. Spend time daily in His Word and in prayer and meditation to help you cover your life up with His example. When faced with a choice, hold it up to God’s Word and see if it reflects a Christ-like spirit. See if it is self-motivated or God-motivated. If you are constant in doing this, it, like anything else you do repetitively, will become habit. Instant choices are more likely to be Godly choices if you work steadfastly on developing this habit. “Seek first the Kingdom of God and HIS Righteousness, and all of these things (what are we going to eat, drink, wear or where are we going to live) will be added to you,” (Matt. 6:33) is not just a Scripture, but a way of life. Remember, “If you WILL yourself to God’s WILL He WILL give you the desires of your heart!”
2. Don’t feel trapped. When you are in a hopeless situation and feel you have no choice but an inappropriate choice, look harder! God promises us a “way of escape” (I Cor. 10:13) in every situation. Much like Uncle Sam in the old Army recruiting poster, Satan, the father of lies (Matt. 8:44), WANTS you! He wants you to feel that you only have a wrong or sinful choice! If after searching you simply cannot find a choice that seems to line up with God’s Will, use Joseph’s actions as a model. When Potipher’s wife sexually attacked him, what did he do? He fled! (Genesis 39:12) Sometimes there are situations that we simply need to run away from. We may have to postpone our decision until after we have had time to pray for wisdom or we may need to just walk away completely from Satan’s pull.
3. Believe that you can change no one but yourself. There is a false sense that we all have of thinking we can actually control another person. This is especially true if the other person is a child, close friend, or family member. We see what they need, we know God’s will, and we want to control their choices. But God created each one of us with a free will, and because of that we do not have the ability to make choices for another. There are times that, though we continue to pray and encourage, we have to step back, pray, and quietly watch a loved one make a decision we feel is not best for them.
4. Remember that though you cannot make choices for others, you alone make your own choice about how you react to the actions of others. When the choices of others strongly have an emotional impact on our lives we cannot lose sight of the fact that we control our reactions. We OWN that choice! The idea of “I did ____ because he did _____” is giving someone else the power they simply do not have. Each of us stands responsible for ourselves. “Chose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, but as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.” (Joshua 24:15) We each have the ability to set our own boundaries and draw our own lines in the sand, but we must always own our reactions to the actions of others!
5. Know Who is in control! Many people become consumed at living in the past and trying to point to a choice they or someone else made that was their downfall. Never live under the false assumption that a wrong choice can never turn into a right choice. There are no truly “right” or “wrong” choices when you are constantly following the above four steps. There may be a temporary roadblock or turn in the road, but if you are living a Godly life God can take your past mistakes and turn them into future blessings. God has the power to take any choice and make it the right one. This understanding takes the burden off of you and helps you realize that with God in control “all things work together for good.” (Romans 8:28)
Allowing these five guidelines to help you in decision making will reinforce the truth that better daily choices lead to better lifetime choices. Though we all make mistakes regularly, if we are striving to make Christ-like choices each step of the way, our day-to-day decisions will improve. God created us in His image and the closer we walk with making the choices He would have us make, the more peace and serenity this earthly life will hold…so, go ahead, make that choice!
Roberta Pledge
June 2011
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